~*GAAAH! BLAH V-DAY ver. 2.0*~

So it's getting suckier and suckier by the minute. As usual, our office started celebrating V-day this Monday. Looking back, I headed the V-day Committee 2 years ago. I told my committee to wear something red. And I, in keeping with my tradition, still wore black that day BUT with a slim red belt and a strappy lil pair of red sandals. So technically, I was wearing SOMETHING red. *Snicker*Snicker*

So okay, going back to this year's V-day committee gimmicks. Well to start with, they're showing romantic movies this week every lunch time at the canteen. It's like a lil cozy drive-in movie, only this time, yer sittin down munchin your lunch. Yesterday they showed Sweet Home Alabama, today they showed Nottinghill. Ahhh, I loved Hugh Grant's British accent "Roight, roight (right, right)" and "whoopsiedaisies!". Such a wimpy character. Are all British dudes as wimpy as the characters he usually portrays? Hmm. Cute but, uhhh, really wimpy. They're showing Serendipity tomorrow. Ahhh. My dear eternally youthful John Cusack. On Fri, they'll show My Best Friend's Wedding. Gaah. I might cry over my lousy cafeteria food when I see that again! Well on Thurs they're skippin the movie coz we have this dating game thing. Haha. We were able to get Maui Taylor. Mommy Rose Flaminiano was kind enough to book her for us. And would you imagine, we ain't even paying her anything monetary. Just a Body Shop gift cheque and stuff. HA! As if she couldn't afford to buy that herself! Apparently, Atty. Flaminiano is handling Maui's case against Viva (that topless still photos of hers brouhaha....) that's why I think Mommy Rose can easily commit her to a gig. And of course, we've been quite lenient with FLT's payables anyway... Bianx is malakas kay Mommy Rose kya ayun... Ahh poor Bianx, she has to make hatid-sundo pa si Maui on Thurs and then she'll host pa the Dating Game. Hahah. Tama ba naman yun? Overused na talents nya! Kawawa naman!

Okay, so my rant... Gaaah! Yesterday around 3pm, they blasted these stupid old love songs over the PA system for a good 8 minutes or so. About three sordid songs. Gaaah. Like, they played one of those hackneyed King & Queen of Hearts types of songs. I think I even heard an Air Supply song or something. Anyway, so there I was making this report on my PC and lo & behold the stupid love songs fill the airwaves. The PA system's speaker is right above my work area. So I was like, "WTF?!" and then my kewl guy boss goes "WHAT is UP with THAT music?!". Hilarious in a mad way! Hahaha. So I went "Gaaah! Can they just stop?! Ano ba yan, wala ba silang consideration sa mga singles na malungkot? If their intention was to make us feel the Happy Valentine's Day, well it doesn't make me happy AT ALL!!! Gaaaah!" Well mysteriously (and thankfully!) today, they didn't blast the PA system with love songs. Maybe the bitchy singles staged a mad revolution to the committee. Wahaha.

Ooh, and then there's these tacky powerpoint slide shows they've been spamming our email inboxes with. There's this "Singles of Kodak" thingiemajig. And there we were... they scanned our pic from our resumes and business cards. They made a stupid collage with our stupid forlorn faces all over the slide show. Like "the Singles of Kodak" "Vote for your favorite singles of the day" or some revolting tag line like that. I'm praying everyday that my face won't be plastered on that Singles of the Day Winner powerpoint that they've been emailing since yesterday. Isn't that such a massive injustice? (Okay, I'm on OA mode now, forgive me! But indulge me, will yah!) Hello?! Can you please NOT point out that I am single AND unattached?! What the fudge is that all about, huh?! Unless the grand prize is a date with Brad Turvey or maybe Jay R, can you not include me in that ridiculous contest? NOT during V-day season! Call me that any other day, but NOT on V-day! >:P Gaaaaah.

Okay, so that was lil miss beeotchy me possesed by the anti-v-day cupid. Har-har.

~*MY LIFE WITHOUT ME*~



*Sob*Sob* Those of you who love movies that make 'em cry, this one's for you. I totally love the drama of this art film. It's got a well-written script... especially the narratives of the main character, Ann. My Life Without Me ("Mi Vida Sin Mi") stars his royal {Felicity} hotness, Scott Speedman. The lead character reminds me of the regal beauty of Gwyneth Paltrow and Uma Thurman.

The official site is a treat to surf. The macromedia flash which shows the same intro as that of the movie is so *gushes* cool.

http://www.clubcultura.com/clubcine/clubcineastas/isabelcoixet/mividasinmi/index.htm

*Sigh* I love it when Scott Speedman whispers as he talks. Oh so tender mush. Gaah. He's so, uhmm, dreamy. And in the movie, supposedly, here's how they first met: The last Nirvana concert before Kurt Cobain died -- He really didn't like Nirvana much so he was bored, was lookin around, and then he saw this girl (Ann) crying. He came up to her. He didn't have a tissue or a handkerchief so he took off his shirt and wiped her tears away. *Awww* And he was such a cute, patient father to their 2 daughters. And he was such a sweet hubby to her. Gaah. That scene where he just got home and he said all he wanted was a kiss... And then when she was off to work, he asked her to sing to him. And that scene when they were abt to sleep... how he said that Ann never complained, how she made him want to be a better man. Gaaaah.

Ahh. And now we go to that Lee character. One of Ann's goals (Things to Do Before I Die list) was to make a stranger fall in love with her and to sleep with another man just to know what it's like (She married Scott Speedman's character when she was 17. He was her first.) Yeah. Made me think like, What do you need to do that for? Scott Speedman is just soooo perfect! But oh, how she met that Lee dude is just so mushily cute. They met in a laundromat. Well, actually, he saw her first at the resto where she was writing down her Things to Do Before I Die list. So anyway, gaaah, that laundromat scene is one of my faves. He went out to buy her coffee and when he came back she was already asleep. And he just tucked her in with his jacket. He sat across her. He stared at her, he watched her sleep. And that dude had such soulful eyes. *Sigh* Ahh, such a powerful, dramatic, romantic scene for me. You can just feel his longing as he sits there silently. Gaaah. And oh how he cried in that scene when Scott Speedman picked up Ann. Ahh, men do cry when they're in love.




Ooh. I found another official site... Kewl. Another kick-ass flash site.
http://www.sonyclassics.com/mylifewithoutme/flash/index.html

Haha. And then there's this eccentric hairdresser in braids who just absolutely adores Milli Vanilli. Her insights and parallelisms about Milli Vanilli were entertaining.

I swear, go buy the DVD if you see it over at Makati Cinema Square. Go buy !!! Go buy!!! Yeah, No to Piracy, but hey, where else can I get my artfilm DVDs anyway?! And plus, isn't it just a wee bit insane to buy a DVD at Php800+ when you can buy it for a measly Php80? Just as long as it's a real DVD copy and not a laser or tape copy, I am sold to the idea of buying el cheapo ones. It's a guilty pleasure, hehehe.

Twenty thumbs up! Well maybe I'm a bit biased coz Scott Speedman's in the movie. But hey, if you're the type who likes a good cry from the movies like me, you'll love this art film!

Ahh. Definitely makes My Treasured DVD list ;)

~* THE WAY WE WERE *~

I popped in the "The Way We Were" DVD this afternoon. I was so curious about why this movie was a classic coz Carrie Bradshaw and the rest of the SATC girls made a reference to it in one episode (I think in Season 3... when Big got married to Natasha). "Your girl is lovely, Hubbell." Gaaah. That scene made my heart ache like hell. And then the theme song's poignant notes float in the air. Gaaah. Kill me now, why don't you.

Another super tear-jearking scene was that part when Katy called up Hubbell, begging for him to come over coz she can't sleep, that she needed someone to talk to about those things, about someone they both knew, she said he was her best friend and it was so dumb how she was calling him up... I totally related to that scene. Like, isn't it sad that when you have so much pain in your heart, the only person you want to talk to who can stop your crying is exactly the same person who made you cry? Gaaah. *sob*sob*

And ooh, I just realized that Robert Redford is indeed once a hottie. It's a shame he's old and wrinkled like a sharpe now. He did look sorta Brad Pitt-ish... blonde hair, blue eyes, charming smile. He reminded me of Brad Pitt in Meet Joe Black.

And oh, I love that Katy-crossing-the-street scene. "What are you celebrating?" Katie asks Hubbell who was drinking beer. "Getting you to cross the street," Hubbell replies.

And the break-up scene:

Hubbell: Look, Katy, I--
Katy: Oh God, please don't start a sentence with "look" -- it's always bad news.

****

Katy: Wouldn't it be lovely if we were old? We'd have survived all this. And everything would be easy and uncomplicated, the way it was when we were young.
Hubbell: Katy, it was never uncomplicated.
Katy: But it was lovely. Wasn't it?
Hubbell: Yes. It was lovely.

I love the film. It's so mushy, it really made me cry. Such heart-wrenching mush.

Memories light the corner of my mind.
Misty water-colored memories
Of the way we were.

Scattered pictures of the smiles we left behind,
Smiles we gave to one another
For the way we were.

Can it be that it was all so simple then,
Or has time rewritten every line?
If we had the chance to do it all again,
Tell me, would we? Could we?

Memories may be beautiful and yet,
What's too painful to remember
We simply choose to forget.
So it's the laughter
We will remember,
Whenever we remember
The way we were.

The way we were.

~ The Way We Were, Barbra Streisand


Gaaah. The Drama Queen is in tha houz.

I miss him. I miss him terribly that it's killing me. Do I ever cross his mind? Does he even think of how we kinda started around this same month last year? I do. I do remember... Every bit... Of the way WE were.

And in THAT moment I was happy. Happy. I Wish You Were Here. Ahh. The Incubus theme song. He made me euphoric and insanely happy. And at a certain point, I was so convinced that he was the one. The one who made all my suffering to finally make sense. And the moment he dragged the name of God in one of those conversations, I thought, Oh dear God, thank you for sending him to me. "In God's time, you'll fall in love for the right reasons, to the right person. When that time comes, that love will be worth the wait, the tears and the pain. Then you'll forget you ever cried."


There's something about
The look in your eyes
Something I noticed when
The light was just right
It reminded me twice
That I was alive
And it reminded me that
You're so worth the fight...

~ Echo, Incubus



But who would've known huh? Who would have known it would end up this way. When I was resting my head on his shoulders at the backseat of the car on the way home from the theater, how was I supposed to know it would end up this way?

Tried so hard...So hard to say goodbye. ~ She Will Be Loved, Maroon5

Some wounds are so deep there can be no immediate relief, no consolation; there may even be an ocean of grief extending in every direction and apparently endless. In some way, all suffering is in God. Thus, our pain is God's pain and that means in due time it will become life-giving and healing in the very measure of its intensity.

So when, God? When is my time? I am so tired of the hits and misses. So tired, God. So tired.

Why did he leave? I will never ever really know why unless I shake the daylights out of him. I thought I really understood back then, but then, not anymore. It would be nice if he could tell me what the f@#% really happened back there. But I resolved not to ever communicate with him. So there. But I fear I might break that resolution in a few days. I am so tempted to text him and ask what's up ... but what I would've wanted to say was I miss him terribly that it was killing me.



Maybe you'll soon
Forget about all
Or maybe you'll miss it like I do...

... I don't wanna write
I don't wanna call
I would not know what to say
It should be you
That's how I want it to be
Tell me you feel the same way

Oh yesterday
I was feeling safe
All I do today
is trying to be brave...

~ Tatooed on My Mind, D'Sound

~*I WILL SEE SOMETHING INFINITELY INTERESTING*~

*Wooohooo* I got mah Incubus gig tickets, baby!!!! Row 23, Premiere Right Side. Gaaahh. I wanna fast forward to March 12 already please!!!! Ooohlahlah Brandon Boyd heaven here I come! ;)

Could you show me dear
Something I've not seen?
Something infinitely interesting...

~ Echo, Incubus

I remember my favorite Dilbert comic strip... Dilbert's, uhh, was that a pet cat? Oh anyway, that smart-ass character told Dilbert "The key to happiness is self-delusion. Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing toward oblivion."As pessimistic as it may seem, I sometimes abide by that. Blah.

*P.S. Ahh. Twas Dogbert who said it. Man I want that comic strip! I couldn't find it in the dilbert.com archives anymore :( *

Stupid random thought/fave joke: What do you get when you cross a pitbull with a shi tsu? BULLSH*T. Wahahah. ;P

*Ackkk.* I am not my usual self. I apologize.

~*GAAAH. BLAH V-DAY*~

It started with Tin's email. And just like that, the floodgates were opened. Gaaah. It's freakin' Feb. V-day sucks. Forgive me if I am in a beeeotchy mode. Must be....Out of necessity. Some sort of self-defense mechanism. Coz if I ain't Ms. Beeeotch, I'd be Ms. Drama Queen (which i'm really trying hard not to be coz I'm so freakin' tired of being one and I really promised myself that I would bravely go through this stint.)


Our egroups read:

From: Abbie Real
Date: Mon Feb 2, 2004 8:33 pm
Subject: Dahil Malapit Na Ang Valentines....


Well....

Valentine's? OH WELL! Because of an upcoming launch, I've been pretty distracted with V-Day kaya okay lang. I don't want to be cynical about it pero there's something inside me that wishes na wala ng V-Day. I mean, wala, as in NADA, like an ordinary day. I was at the mall yesterday and may mga V decors na. Ano ba yan?

As for you Aileen...IMO...your Akafella obsession is actually a welcome distraction from Mako and the whole Mako ordeal you have gone through. Okay lang yan, girl. At least may pinagkakalibangan ka.

I'm sure tayo lang dalawa ngayon sa Forces ang mag-bi-bitch about V Day. The rest are obviously IN LOVE. As for Charo...ano nga ba, sis? Hehe! Uyy!

aileenrose.coronado@kodak.com wrote:

Gaaah. I miss our girl talks =*( Abbie, I miss our TIB dayz! Wala na kong
instant lunch bonding =*(
Ewan ko ba, mag ddreaded V-day na kasi kaya I have this sickening feeling
that I'm sliding back to the *accckkk* missin' maco &
being-depressed-in-my-love life-in-general state

But then again maybe not. Must be because I've not been to an AKAfellas
gig lately. *teehee*


From: Abbie Real
Date: Mon Feb 2, 2004 12:16 am
Subject: Re: [Forces of Nature] can relate ka ba???


Hahaha! Natawa ako ha! NAKA-RELATE? OO naman!

Sometimes, you don't know if you are still capable of THE feeling. Tagal ko ng hindi kayo nakaka-chika and dami ko na din kwento. In the previous months na hindi ko kayo nakita I think I felt almost all the emotions associated with loving someone. From downright cynical to passionately, deeply and madly inlove. Haaay! At least I'm surviving!



I was in such a depressed mood today despite our Brothers Burger lunch out. On the way home, I was like swinging from bitchiness to uber-drama mode and back. Gaaaah. Friggin V-day sh*t. Awww, I miss Hero. Dang, I miss ITY. Ahhh. ITY, the benchmark of my ideal guy. But weird, I've been checkin' his friendster testimonials... he doesn't seem to be the same guy I knew back in college. He seemed to have lost something as he got hooked with the trappings of life in the states and his life now over umm, there. Oh well. And then there's this dude who reminds me of him. Aww. Long soulful talks. Yeah. I wish. I don't really know him well but based on his friendster testimonial (what a modern way to spy on people! ahaha.) he seems like a very sweet, smart guy who's really boyfriend material --not just boylet, mind you. Gaaah, he's sooo lambing to talk to. Oh good gawd I hope he ain't readin this.

Ahhh. February just sucks big time.>:P

That upcoming Jason Mraz gig should better cheer me up or else...

~*SUDDENLY MISSING ROCKWELL RYAN*~

Ahhh. I was so bored online that I decided to catch up with what's goin' on with my good ol' dear Rockwell Ryan. Man, I'm so happy for him... everything is starting to look really well for him... he's about to sign up with this manager who used to handle Jars of Clay. Kewlness. Gaaah, I miss him! I miss coming up to him & Dain during their numerous gigs here in Manila. Oh well, he did say he's gonna be back here sometime this year and tour with his band... Ahhh. I can't hardly wait!!! I miss hearing him sing & play guitar live onstage. Ooh, plus I have a digital cam now which can take unlimited videos. *Weee.* I wanna hear "Waited Too Long" again. Oh but then again NOT NOW. Not when the dreaded V-day is coming. *Acckkkk* Or I might start to be mushy & reminisce & curse & cry. Gaaaah. Not him again. Darn it. It HAS indeed been a year since... Oh f%@#. Must stop. Must stop. *starts singing Help Me Forget...*

Drat. Something is wrong with Rockwell's site. Page cannot be displayed. But hhhuwhyyy? :(

Well anywayz, for the curious and for pluggin' purposes, here's his site:

http://www.rockwellryan.com

... and his MB that I've been so remiss posting on/visiting (guilty! way too much akafellas kasi eh!:P ):

http://pub75.ezboard.com/brockwellryanonlinecommunity

*Yey* I have his personally signed CD # 450! Thanks to Yam whose online order at awarestore I "rode" with. Man , Rockwell is just sooo talented. He wrote ALL the lyrics & the music in his album, produced it & the old Stephen Speaks albums, he made Stephen Speaks to what it has been from Tulsa to Manila. I just pray that God will continue to bless him coz he reaaally deserves it. It's all been blood, sweat and tears for him... and look at how great things are comin' along for him now. *Woohoos for Rockwell...* Ahhh, Jamie Bond is just sooo lucky, lucky, lucky.

I will laugh, I will cry, I will close my eyes
Cause I know that it won't be long
Until we meet again.

Though I wish that I were with you now
I know there's a reason for space
I can dream of memories you're writing down
And I look forward to that day
And the smile on your face...


~ Leaving Song, Rockwell Ryan